In the past few decades, funeral services have grown increasingly personalized, although many people still think of the "traditional funeral" as the norm. A personalized funeral or memorial service reflects the unique life and personality of the deceased individual, as viewed by the deceased and/or his or her surviving loved ones, and regardless of the form such services take.
Your first meeting with a funeral director (sometimes referred to as an "arrangement conference") can take place in person—either at the funeral home or at your own home—or over the phone. This initial meeting is an opportunity for you to ask questions, learn more about the services offered by the funeral home, and get a general sense of what the funeral home in question is like. The funeral director should be friendly, courteous, well-informed and compassionate. You may have many questions and requests, and the funeral director should listen attentively and provide answers.
I’m glad that you mention how it’s important to know the funeral arrangements you want, such as burial services or cremation. Once you know this and other requirements, such as where you want the burial, it might help to start research funeral homes in the area. Finding a local one could ensure that the services can get done quickly and you can properly remember your deceased loved one.

You may want to check their urn collection and caskets. Check the cleanliness and appearance of the funeral home. Assess if the staffs are helpful. Ask if they respect your religious and cultural beliefs. Check to see if they utilize modern technology. Choose a funeral home with a funeral director you are agreeable with and you like the facilities.
For families minded to take a more hands-on approach, there are coffin suppliers who deal directly with the public. However, it is important be aware of quality and that many crematoria expect coffins to be accredited by the Funeral Furnishing Manufacturers’ Association or other authority. Crematoria also require coffins to be compliant with Government regulations on emissions. Check with suppliers and the crematorium in question before making payment.
Make an appointment to visit those funeral homes if possible. Bring a list of questions and a friend or family member less emotionally invested in the funeral than you are. Ask the funeral home for their General Price List and have the director review it with you. You might want to see an array of urns or caskets, ask about their billing policy, or meet the staff. Do you like the facility? Does the funeral director seem helpful and trustworthy, and answer questions willingly? Is he or she sensitive to your values and cultural or religious needs? Don’t select a funeral provider unless you feel completely comfortable with the director and the premises.
My grandpa is very sick, and my mother is trying to find a funeral service to get everything in order beforehand. I like that you say to visit several funeral homes and bring a list of questions as well as try to meet the staff. This will help you get an idea if you are comfortable with the director as well as the home. Also, I agree that you should weigh your priorities and see if you want the funeral home to be close to your home, a church, or a cemetery and decide which is most important.
Have you and your family discussed a budget, and decided on an amount that’s affordable for you—that you’re willing and able to spend without hardship? Shopping for a funeral should be like making any major purchase—you know what you can afford before you start shopping. Don’t make the mistake of buying a funeral the way many people do—accepting the funeral home’s price then scrambling to find the money.
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